Spike asked Buffy to go to the store and pick up a few things for him. “I would love, but I’m tied up in this…”

“Yeah, sure. Tara’s coming over to help me study…”

“Ok, I’ll tell her you’ll be back soon. Have you talked to her about…?”

Buffy shook her head. “Not yet. I didn’t want to do it over the phone. I’ll be back in like twenty minutes.”

“Thanks again, pet.”

Five minutes later, Tara knocked on the door. Spike greeted her with a polite smile, and let her in.

“Where’s Buffy?”

“At the store. She’ll be back shortly. Have a seat. Would you like something to drink?” Painfully polite.

“Um, no thank you.”

The tension in the room was high—both of them suspicious and unsure of where exactly to begin. Spike took a deep breath and decided to just dive right in.

“Tara, you need to back off of Buffy.”

“Back off?”

“She doesn’t understand…she thinks this is all in good fun. Thinks we’re playing a game. We both know you’re not playing.”

Tara remained silent. Spike waited several minutes for her to respond, but when she didn’t, he pushed on—the silence was uncomfortable and awkward.

“I think you’re taking advantage of her basic…”

“Advantage? You’re talking to me about taking advantage of her?”

“What?”

“Please, Spike, if anybody has taken advantage of her, it’s you.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’ve read the book…she filled me in on the details. She was just a kid, Spike. But that didn’t stop you.”

“Buffy knew…”

“Buffy knew that she wanted to please you. You were her first love, right? Did it ever occur to you that maybe this is just a hold-over?”

Spike shook his head. “I am really not going to talk to you about my relationship with her…especially since that part is long over.”

“Is it Spike? Or do you still treat her like a child?”

“She is an adult woman…”

“Then why are we even having this conversation? She can make her own decisions.”

“Because I think…know…you have ulterior motives.”

“You’re right, Spike, I do. I want what’s best for her.”

“And what is that? You?”

“I wouldn’t scare her the way you do. Some times she comes to me terrified because she doesn’t know how you would react to something she’s said or done. I wouldn’t keep her guessing about my feelings. I wouldn’t hold out on her. I wouldn’t abandon her for days to work. I’d take her out and show her a good time—show her how much I appreciate her. She deserves that at least.”

“Don’t. Don’t tell me what she deserves…what’s best for her. You don’t know her.”

“I do Spike. Where do you think she is when you’re gone? She’ with me…telling me about her dreams and fear and concerns, asking me her questions. She trusts me with her secrets.”

“And you think she doesn’t trust me? As much time as you spend with her, you don’t know anything about her.”

“Tell me, Spike…what does she plan to do after graduation?”

“She hasn’t decided.”

“She wants to go work in California. She’s already got a job. Do you want more examples?”

“And if she doesn’t love you? What are you going to do? Make her? She’s not a lesbian, Tara. She’s not even bisexual.”

“How do you know? Maybe it’s more than just curiosity.”

“And what if it’s not?”

“Then she won’t be with me…but then, maybe she won’t be with you either. I’ll always be her friend though. I’ll always love her and be there for her. I’ll always support her…”

Spike narrowed his eyes. “What do you have against me, Tara? Why do you resent me so much? Just because I met Buffy first?”

“Because what you did to her was wrong, immoral, unethical…disgusting.”

“She managed to forgive me.”

“I notice you aren’t denying it.”

“So you hate me because five years ago I did something I shouldn’t have? Before you knew either one of us?”

“I didn’t hate you until I re-read the book…by then I knew Buffy…knew the girl that you so blithely took advantage of.”

“So what? You’re going to save her from the evil man?”

“No, I’m going to save her from the creep who manipulated and hurt her.”

Spike swallowed hard, her words cutting him deeply. Before he could respond though, the girl in question burst into the door. “Good god, those people at the supermarket are a bunch of morons. Hey Tara.”

“Hey Buffy. Ready to get to work?”

“I am.” She handed the bags to Spike. “There you go.”

“Thanks love.”

She kissed him on the cheek. “I bought raviolis for dinner tonight.”

“Sounds good.” Spike didn’t think he was ever going to be able to eat again.

“Come on Tara, all my stuff is in the bedroom. We can just work in there.”

As soon as they were out of the room, Spike collapsed on the couch. Numb. Tired. Shocked. Guild-ridden. Heartbroken.

From: [identity profile] xionin.livejournal.com


tara, tara, tara.

you know how when you write something and people spin their on interpretations on it? tara, honey, you read a book. you know the people. that doesn't mean you know the whole story. you want buffy, so you tell yourself whatever you need to in order to make spike the bad guy that she must be saved from. love is blind...and often stupid. i fear you'll learn your lesson the hard way, sweetheart.

and spike? let. it. go. stop feeling guilty about the past, baby. if it hadn't happened, you wouldn't have this future.

now buffy, good lord girl...open your eyes!

From: [identity profile] pukajen.livejournal.com

what she said


i completely agree, 100%. tara READ the parts of what spike chose to tell the world. she read parts that were filled with his thoughts, his guilt, his lust, his feelings. the book was written while spike was still aching from what had happened.
there are still so many issues that need to be dealt with from what happened that first time around.
i wish buffy had heard what tara had said, it would be a wake up call. buffy has no idea what's going on, and she needs to. due to many factors, buffy only really sees what she wants to, what she needs to.
and tara is flat out lying, she things what spike did was wrong, horrible, immoral, well pot, the kettle is telling you that you are blacker then pitch.
now back to watching the west wing as i break down my script.

From: [identity profile] esile.livejournal.com


And that pain in the bottom of my stomach is back....

Ahh, you make it hurt in all the right places.

From: [identity profile] pastelstar.livejournal.com


Nooooooooo! Tara's wrong about Spike, but he's upset cause he believes her! Tara thinks that Spike holds out on Buffy cause he doesn't trust her and doesn't think she's that important to him...when really, Buffy's so completely his world, he's afraid to be too open with her. Arrrrgh!

More pepper, more! You're like a machine!

From: (Anonymous)

BITCH!


Bitch,bitch, fucking bitch! Pepper I hate Tara in this story with a firey passion. LOL

From: (Anonymous)


Okay, now Tara's really pissin' me off. I hope that Buffy gets a clue, and is the one to set Tara straight on things. I was hoping Buffy would walk in on their conversation earlier. Tara thinks Spike manipulated her and treats her like a child? That's exactly what Tara is doing herself. Grr, please Pepper, make this nightmare end soon?

- Angie

From: [identity profile] dettiot.livejournal.com


Aiiiieeeeeeeee. Suddenly, I don't like Tara very much. Grrrrr. [feels her protective mommy instincts towards Buffy and Spike come out]

From: (Anonymous)


Tara's is only seeing one side, the side she only what's to see, it seems She really needs a good dose of reality; she needs to see how much Spike and Buffy love and care for one another. Buffy acts like a normal wife, most women have secrets that they don't share with their spouse immediately, they often have 'girl friends' to vent to, and that's all it is, venting. I hope Tara doesn't push Buffy into something she will regret, and I really hope Buffy wakes up and smell's the coffee. I think Tara's dislike of Spike is only because Spike has what she wants
Sorry, now I'm venting. Great job! I can't get enough!

Kathryn

From: [identity profile] ceitnicangus.livejournal.com

Awwe Pepper so heartbreaking


Tara can never be Buffy's friend she has a plan to seperate her and Spike.

Buffy needs to grow up a bit and take as step back and say what is going on here. I am glad that Spike told her to take it slowly but I think that Tara will want it to be quicker.


From: [identity profile] angelchicken.livejournal.com


Guh! This is just painful! Open Your Eyes, Buffy!!!

Tara- maybe she is actually with Spike because she loves him.

And Buffy doesn't like to be manipulated, which is exactly what you are doing to her. Hello Kettle, it's Tara. You're black (hee. I love that line. It makes me giggle).

I don't know if I have ever read Tara being so manipulative and out and out bitchy, and I have to say I like it. I just can't wait until she gets hers. HA! She's going to lose her friendship. Poor Buffy, losing her confidant.

Please update again very soon. Maybe right now. Thank you!

From: (Anonymous)


Oops, I accidentally pushed the back button and it double-posted. Weird.
- Angie

From: (Anonymous)


Okay, I guess it didn't double-post. This is confusing.

From: [identity profile] blue-larkspur.livejournal.com


I love it. Tara has an agenda. Buffy is clueless. Poor Buffy, she's going to lose a friend at the end of this. Because there's no way she'll choose Tara over Spike. Is there? Aagghh. I love this story so much. You rock, Pepper.

From: [identity profile] sweet-ali.livejournal.com


See, no one ever knows a relationship unless they're actually in it. And even though i do think Tara is simply twisting things to her advantage, all she does see is Buffy when she is upset about Spike. Because we don't have to run to our friends with all the "good stuff", all the happiness, because...Well, we are happy. We go to our friends for the bad stuff, and somtimes our friends get the wrong impression of how things really are.

Tara can never be Buffy's friend, not now. That can of worms is open and well, it's in the fabric. No real way to get 'em out now. I do think Buffy will see what's behind Tara's motives now.

And I'm curious about this job that Buffy hasn't told Spike about and if this will be their next journey together.

From: [identity profile] mydeira.livejournal.com


And Tara fights back. She makes a lot of good points. Poor Spike. But if Spike and Buffy actually talked about things before they built to the point to exploding, maybe these situations wouldn't keep arising. Another thought-provoking installment.
.

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